I can’t believe this freak just took my slushy
August 7th, 2008Recently I came across a CD of audio from this semi-band project I was in back in something like 1999 or 2000. My pal Bijan and I were gonna both play guitar, and then instead of having a singer, we’d just have a dat player playing these stories that we would record. (I’m sure This American Life was on at the time, but I wasn’t aware of it.) The songs’ dynamics would match what was going in the story…
I only managed to record 3 stories, and we had all of 4 practices before we gave it up. Then I advised Bijan at work that if they didn’t give him a raise he should quit. They didn’t, he did, and the next thing I knew he had moved to New York. It was crazy.
The CD I found has two of the stories I recorded — the third, which was fantastic, has been lost to the aether.
First is Mr. B (initials for names to protect the storytellers)…a guy I worked with a handful of times. A real old-school producer guy, who talked a mile a minute and smoked constantly. He wore all black and was a blast to hang around with. I just figured he’d have a good story, so I got the mic and started recording…his story is split into two parts…the first sound you will hear is Mr. B lighting a cigarette…
[audio:01_Bill1.mp3]
In part two, at the appropriate time, Bijan and I were going to start playing J Geils’ "Angel is a Centerfold" and it would slowly get louder and louder as the story went on, before erupting into a massive crescendo at the end! Whatta show it would have been!
[audio:02_Bill2.mp3]
Next is J, who worked with us for a while at Team. If you knew her, you’d never guess that as a kid she was chubby and unathletic…Bijan and I were practicing in Team’s rarely used 2nd floor space, after-hours, and J saw us one night and asked what we were up to. An aspiring actress (wonder where she is now?) she said she had a good story…
[audio:03_Jana1.mp3]
You’re right – right up TAL’s street. You should have done it man. I think Mr B would be a great part of a three feature line up, and with Miss J, all you needed was that last story.
The last (lost) story was so good too! BBCAmerica had this producer named Reg and he told me this wild story about being a local radio DJ in the UK and getting stalked by this woman. It starts off pretty funny and odd, and then goes quickly into intense and worrying.
I recorded it into the DS (which I was learning to use at the time) and then at some point someone cleared all the media off it and it was gone. Add it into the file of lost gems…